THE MOST INTERESTING PEOPLE IN POLITICS AND HISTORY: 250 ANECDOTES
By David Bruce
Dedicated with Love to Abigail Renae Jacobs and Bryce David Jacobs
Copyright 2007 by Bruce D. Bruce
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Cover Photograph
Photographer: Gino Santa Maria
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The Most Interesting People in Politics and History: 250 Anecdotes
Chapter 1: From Activism to Free Speech
Activism
• African-American college students started a unique form of protest in early 1960 when they staged sit-ins. At the time, Jim Crow laws segregating blacks and whites were common in the South. Whites could drink from one drinking fountain, and blacks had to drink from a different drinking fountain. Whites could use one set of restrooms, and blacks had to use a different set of restrooms. This segregation pervaded the South and extended to lunchrooms. To protest the segregation, African-American college students used to go to a whites-only lunchroom, sit down, and wait to be served. They were not served; however, they would continue to sit at the lunch counter, taking up a seat that could have been used by a white customer whom the lunchroom would have been happy to serve. Eventually, the lunchrooms began to serve black people.
• When comedian Whoopi Goldberg did a joke about George W. Bush with the word “Bush” having a double meaning, a certain outraged Republican-friendly television network demanded a videotape of Whoopi telling the joke. After hearing this, comedian Kate Clinton says she sent the network a 43-hour videotape of the network’s jokes about President Bill Clinton and his little flesh-colored friend. The network returned the videotape. In response to Whoopi’s joke, the suits at Slimfast decided to drop her as their spokesperson. Therefore, to show support for Whoopi, Ms. Clinton attempted to organize a protest in which participants would throw Slimfast into the harbor at Provincetown, but the protest fell through. According to Ms. Clinton, the harbormaster wouldn’t allow them to throw Slimfast into the water because Slimfast is environmentally toxic.
• TV’s Mister Rogers once watched a violent Saturday morning cartoon with a grandson. In the cartoon were lots of machine guns and lots of shooting. Mister Rogers confessed that what he was watching was scary, even to an adult like him. His grandson looked surprised, then said that the bad guys were the people being shot, so Mister Rogers pointed out that there are other and better ways of dealing with bad guys. That night, before going to bed, Mister Rogers wrote a public service announcement that stated, “Some television programs are loud and scary, with people shooting and hitting each other. Well, you can do something about that. When you see scary television like that, you can turn it off. And when you do turn it off, that will show you that you are the strongest of them all. It takes a very strong person to be able to turn off scary TV.”
• Sometimes, computer video games will include content that makes a political statement. For example, the 1985 Cold War strategy game Balance of Power made an anti-nuclear war statement. Players were supposed to avoid a nuclear war in the game. Knowing that some players might create a nuclear war simply to see some neat computer graphics, the creators made sure that when a nuclear war erupted in the game, a screen would appear that said simply, “You have ignited a nuclear war …. We do not reward failure.” Another example of political content occurred in the game SimCopter, one of whose creators, Jacques Servin, got fired (in 1996) because he had secretly written computer code that resulted in certain male characters in the game kissing other male characters.
• The Oak Room at the Plaza Hotel in New York was a place where important business lunches were held—and where women weren’t permitted unless a man escorted them. On February 12, 1969, Betty Friedan and other members of the National Organization of Women dressed very nicely and headed to the Oak Room. When the manager would not allow them to enter, they marched past him and seated themselves. However, no one would serve them. Because NOW had alerted the media ahead of time, lots of newspapers, radio stations, and television stations were on hand to capture the scene. A few days after the protest, the Oak Room changed its policy and allowed women to dine there without male escorts.
• Not so long ago, gays were regarded as mentally ill; psychiatrists, including Charles Socarides, forced some gays to undergo aversion therapy in which they were shown photographs of nude men, then were electrically shocked or forced to vomit. Some gays were even legally given electroshock treatments. Gay activists fought back, and in 1970 they infiltrated a meeting of the American Psychiatric Association. A film shown at the meeting depicted gays being forced to vomit whenever they saw photographs of nude men. When the film was shown, the gay men infiltrating the meeting waited until photographs of nude men appeared on screen, then they cheered. A few years later, the APA decided that being homosexual was NOT a mental disease. (One wonders if Dr. Socarides ever apologized to the gays he tortured.)
• Vera Cáslavská of Czechoslovakia engaged in an impressive act of activism at the 1968 Olympic Games in Mexico City. The Soviet military had rolled into Czechoslovakia two months earlier, putting an end to free speech. In Mexico City, Ms. Cáslavská won the gold medal in the women’s gymnastics all-around competition and received a total of four gold and two silver medals at this Olympics. She shared the gold medal in the floor exercise event with Soviet athlete Larissa Petrik. While the Czech national anthem played, Ms. Cáslavská stood tall and was proud, but when the Soviet national anthem played, she hung her head and was sad. Everyone at the Olympics knew what the Czech citizen was sad about.
• During the Montgomery, Alabama, bus boycott, which lasted 381 days, blacks declined to ride on the city’s segregated buses. Instead, they walked, rode in car pools, and took taxis. African-American taxi drivers even lowered their prices to match those offered by the bus company. An African-American minister who worked in the car pool organized by the Montgomery Improvement Association asked an elderly black woman who was walking, “Sister, aren’t you getting tired?” She replied, “My soul has been tired for a long time. Now my feet are tired, and my soul is resting.” The Supreme Court ruled that the segregated buses were against the Constitution, and the boycott ended in victory for the civil rights workers.
• On June 30, 1966, the third National Conference of State Commissions on the Status of Women was held in Washington, D.C. Betty Friedan attended, along with some other women who planned to ask the government workers attending the commission to treat sex discrimination seriously. Unfortunately, they quickly discovered that the government workers had no intention of listening to them, so during the conference Ms. Friedan and the other women started planning an organization that would take sex discrimination seriously. That organization, which was created under the noses of the government workers who had ignored them, was the National Organization of Women.
• Union organizer Mother Jones knew the effects of child labor at first hand. To learn about working conditions in Southern mills, she had taken jobs at some of them, where she had worked alongside children. Once, she saw heavy machinery tear off one of the fingers of a child employee. Another time, she attended the funeral of an 11-year-old child in Alabama who had died in a factory accident. In 1903, Mother Jones drew attention to the situation of children working in the mills in Philadelphia by having them display their injuries—some children were missing thumbs that had been cut off at work, while other children were missing entire hands that had been cut off at work.
• During World War II, the Japanese occupied Malaysia from January 1942 to August 1945. After the occupation of the town of Seremban, a Japanese executive decided to use a pond to raise ducks; therefore, he ordered that the pond be fenced in, then he released 600 ducklings into the pond. However, the Malaysians did not appreciate the Japanese executive’s plans. At the end of two months, only 300 ducklings were still alive, and at the end of three months, only 60 ducklings were still alive. When the Malaysians were questioned about the disappearance of the ducklings, they suggested that the ducklings didn’t know how to swim and therefore must have drowned.
• Lithuanians hated being under Soviet domination, and this hatred appeared in their underground humor. In the town square of Kaunas was a statue of Vladimir Lenin with one hand stretched out to the people, and the other hand behind his back. To illustrate life under the Communists, Lithuanians used to place objects in Lenin’s hands. In the hand behind Lenin’s back was placed a piece of bread, and in the hand stretched out to the people was placed a piece of doggy doo-doo. Also, Lithuanians used to pretend the statue was a scarecrow. Each spring, plants would appear around the statue; Lithuanians had secretly planted the plants.
• Some people may be surprised to learn what the ground in front of the White House contains. When the lover of David Robinson died of AIDS, Mr. Robinson thought of mailing his ashes to the White House to protest the then-administration’s lack of action on research to fight AIDS. However, he decided to do a more public act of protest. Together with many other activists, he (and they) carried the ashes of departed loved ones who had died of AIDS and threw them over the fence onto the White House lawn. It was a rainy day, and the rain mixed the ashes with the soil.
• The great dancer Bill Robinson, aka Mr. Bojangles, worked for social change—and even lobbied the President of the United States on one occasion. Mr. Bojangles met President Franklin Delano Roosevelt when the President was working out details of the New Deal. Mr. Bojangles said to President Roosevelt, “By the way, Mr. President, I see you got some kind of New Deal going. Just remember, Mr. President, when you shuffle those cards, just don’t overlook those spades.”
• In Jerusalem, Myriam Mendilow started Lifeline for the Old, a series of programs for the elderly to give them work and help them earn respect. When she learned that many elderly people in Jerusalem had no health care, she organized a march of elderly people upon the government. Hundreds of elderly people marched to the health ministry at city hall, taking officials by surprise. City and state officials conferred and agreed to work together to provide health care for the elderly.
• Unfortunately, Native Americans often suffer from poverty, alcoholism, high dropout rates, and other evils. Members of the American Indian Movement, an activist organization advocating civil rights for Native Americans, sometimes flew the American flag upside down. This upset many people, but the members of AIM felt that this use of an international distress signal was justified.
• Australians know how to engage in activism. When the Australian prime minister would not apologize to Aborigine peoples because of the removal of Aboriginal children from their homes, 250,000 people in Sydney walked on the Sydney Harbour bridge on May 28, 2000, and a plane above the bridge skywrote the word “Sorry.”
• A couple of gay men were passing a women’s health clinic when they saw a group of protesters out front. Wanting to do something to support their sisters, the first gay man hugged the second gay man, and then the second gay man kissed the first gay man. They kept on hugging and kissing, and soon the protesters dispersed.
• Abbie Hoffman and his Yippies once showed how greedy and materialistic stock traders could be. They showered dollar bills onto the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, creating chaos and stopping the tickertape as stock traders dove to collect the money.
• Often, people (and courts) feel that mothers should receive custody of children when parents divorce. Some fathers have disputed this, and they sometimes protest by carrying signs that say, “We Demand Women’s Equality. Let Men Have Custody.”
Advertising
• Heinz baked beans were popular in Great Britain, but consumers bought private-label baked beans at half the price of Heinz baked beans and liked them. And why not? The private-label baked beans were actually Heinz baked beans; the only difference was that the baked beans were packaged under the store’s name. To get consumers to buy the expensive Heinz baked beans, Heinz resorted to advertising. A TV commercial showed a haughty English schoolgirl eating Heinz baked beans, then asking her mother, “I wonder … if I eat Heinz baked beans every day, do you think I could be … Prime Minister?” Her mother says, “You might, Margaret, you just might.” Suddenly, a look of horror comes over the mother’s face, and she takes the baked beans away from the girl. In another TV commercial, a boy playing a young Neil Kinnock, leader of the opposition to Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, is shown eating Heinz baked beans and asking his mother, “If I eat enough baked beans, do you think I could become Prime Minister?” This time, the mother tells the child not to “talk daft. Not a chance in Hell.” This was accurate, by the way. Mr. Kinnock tried three times to become Prime Minister, but failed each time.
• Paid political announcements can backfire. In 1936, this announcement was broadcast on a Yiddish-language radio station: “My dear friends, I would like for you to vote for Wendell Willkie. Willkie is an honest man, a trustworthy man, a gentleman. He loves Jews. Truly a great human being.” So far, so good. Unfortunately, after a brief pause, the radio personality said these words: “That was a paid political announcement. I, personally, intend to vote for Roosevelt.”
Advice
• After an attempt to remove then-President Mikhail Gorbachev from office in the Soviet Union, many frantic Americans and Soviets went to the American embassy for advice. Some Americans were worried about losing their businesses, and some Soviets were hoping to be allowed to emigrate. An American tour group leader asked for advice, and received the reply to stay out of crowds. Shocked, the American tour group leader asked, “Does that mean I can’t go shopping?”
• Texas governor Ann Richards knew how to give advice to teenagers. She once saw a teenager pouring charcoal lighter directly onto a fire, but she did not tell him directly how stupid such an action was; instead, she said, “Honey, if you keep doing that, the fire is going to climb right back up to that can in your hand and explode and give you horrible injuries, and it will just ruin my entire weekend.”
AIDS
• AIDS activist Tim Bailey wanted his corpse to be thrown over the fence at the White House in protest of the lack of action in combating AIDS. Of course, that wasn’t feasible, so instead he asked that his corpse be carried (in a coffin) in a protest march in Washington, D.C. The political funeral took place in July of 1993. Not surprisingly, the police were against this kind of activism, so a standoff ensued between the living activists and the police, who wouldn’t allow the coffin to be removed from the van that had transported it to Washington. Eventually, the police told the activists that in order for them to have a procession, they needed a death certificate and the corpse had to be examined by a coroner. The coroner examined the corpse, and the activists shouted, “ARE YOU SATISFIED? IS HE DEAD ENOUGH? THIS IS WHAT AIDS LOOKS LIKE. ARE YOU PROUD OF YOURSELF?” Eventually, some of the protesters were arrested, and the remaining protesters carried flowers because Mr. Bailey used to fill his backpack with flowers so he could pass them out during Gay Pride parades.
• In the early 1980s, San Francisco AIDS activist Cleve Jones got the idea for the Names Project, also known as the AIDS Memorial Quilt. In the Names Project, people who wish to honor the memory of a relative, friend, or other loved one who has died of AIDS create a quilt with the loved one’s name on it. Many of the quilts are very simple, while others are very complex. Often, the quilts bear mementos of the person being honored—a love letter, a wedding ring, an article of clothing, and so on. Each quilt measures six feet by three feet, which is approximately the size of a grave.
• Penny Raife Durant, the author of When Heroes Die, a novel for young people about a man who dies from AIDS, spoke with her younger son about AIDS. The conversation was difficult for her, but the result was good. He told her, “I’m just going to say this once. Now you just listen. I don’t intend to have sex before marriage. But if something would happen and I would decide to have sex before marriage, I would use a condom.” She then told her son, “That’s wonderful. I’m very proud of you.”
Alcohol
• In the early part of the 20th century, McLeansboro, Illinois, had a town drunk who showed up bright and early at the town tavern, had a few drinks, then went outside and leaned on one of the porch pillars for an hour, then went back inside for a few more drinks. From opening time to closing time, he would alternate time spent leaning on the pillar with time spent drinking at the bar. One day, he was so drunk that he collapsed near the porch pillar and lay motionless. One of the town’s leading citizens walked by, saw the man lying motionless, then went into the tavern and told the proprietor, “Your sign fell down.”
• In the summer of 1787, Benjamin Franklin worked hard at the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia, but in the evenings he went to a tavern for rest and relaxation. Another delegate, a teetotaler, decided to convince Mr. Franklin to give up his evil ways by showing him a demonstration of the effects of alcohol. He got two glasses and filled one with rum and another with water, then he put a worm in each glass. The worm in the water began to swim, but the worm in the rum quickly died. “What does that teach you?” asked the teetotaler. Mr. Franklin replied, “If you have worms, drink rum.”
• At Kenwood in London is a house that has been turned into a museum. The house was almost destroyed by a mob during the Gordon Riots of 1780, but its steward saved it. Tired from its rioting, the mob decided to stop at the Spaniards Inn before burning the house at Kenwood. The tavern keeper sent a message to the Kenwood steward, warning him of the danger. Thinking quickly, the steward sent for help, and also sent a barrel of ale to the tavern keeper to keep the mob drunk until help arrived. The steward’s plan worked, and the house at Kenwood was saved.
• When the Eighteenth Amendment—which made Prohibition legal—was repealed, citizens celebrated across the United States. In Freeport, Long Island, members of the American Legion formed a firing squad and shot a dummy labeled “Prohibition.” In Milwaukee, a man walked into a newly re-opened hot spot called Heine’s. The bartender asked if he wanted a beer, and the man replied, “Yes, please. Make mine legal.”
Bathrooms
• Lord Louis Mountbatten was understandably happy when he received a prototype model of a new aircraft carrier that he felt could help Great Britain and its allies win World War II. He was eager to show the prototype model to Prime Minister Winston Churchill, and so he asked, “Where is the Old Man?” The reply came back that the Old Man was taking a bath, so Lord Mountbatten took a great liberty and entered the Prime Minister’s bathroom, where Churchill was soaking in the tub. Fortunately, Churchill was also happy to see the prototype model, and according to Lord Mountbatten, he played with it in the tub “as if it were a rubber duck.”
• Members of royalty get special privileges. The Duke of Windsor occasionally ate at Le Pavillon in New York. Whenever he went to the bathroom, the proprietor of the restaurant, Henri Soule, guarded the door—no one was allowed to see the Duke of Windsor in the bathroom.
Celebrities
• While in Yugoslavia, movie star Kirk Douglas wanted to meet Tito, so he paid a visit to the British embassy, where he met the British ambassador, who told him, “My boy, I’ve been here for six weeks and have yet to see Tito. You don’t stand a chance.” The very next day, Tito sent his very own private plane to take Mr. Douglas to Lubiana, where the two men met. When Mr. Douglas returned, the British ambassador asked him how such an amazing event could happen. Mr. Douglas replied, “Mr. Ambassador, how many movies have you made?”
• Satiric songwriter Tom Lehrer has his share of fans. At a party hosted by John Kenneth Galbraith, he and Jackie Kennedy were introduced to a woman who ignored Jackie, turned to Mr. Lehrer, and cried in astonishment, “Tom Lehrer!”
Children
• Children who are refugees often have had tough childhoods. One 12-year-old refugee girl from El Salvador said, “I have never had any toys. All I’ve ever done is work.” A boy living in a refugee camp in Thailand helped his family survive by going to a cemetery and looking for mint. He traded the mint for cane sugar, which he then traded for rice for his family and him to eat.
• The BBC’s Jenni Murray recognizes the influence that Margaret Thatcher had as the first woman to serve as British Prime Minister. When the news came that Ms. Thatcher would be replaced by John Major, Ms. Murray’s nine-year-old asked her, “Mum, is that right? I thought prime minister was a woman’s job.”
Clothing
• The first time Margaret Bourke-White wanted to take Mahatma Gandhi’s photograph, she had to show that she knew how to use a spinning wheel before she was allowed to meet the great man. At the time, the British took cotton from India, shipped it to Great Britain where it was made into clothing, then shipped it back to India to be sold. To create jobs for the citizens of India, Gandhi wanted them to weave the cotton into cloth. After taking a quick lesson in spinning, Ms. Bourke-White was able to demonstrate sufficient competence to see Gandhi and to take a world-famous photograph of him.
• Ann Richards, former governor of Texas, did not put up with BS. Going through an airport metal detector while she was wearing underpants with metal snaps, she set off an alarm and the security guard wanted to take her to a private area where Ms. Richards’s private parts could be investigated thoroughly. However, Ms. Richards was late for her flight, so she told the security guard, “I will take off my pants here and now—right here.” The security guard decided to let her board her flight without any further annoyance.
• President George W. Bush was widely despised both at home and abroad. In Seattle, Washington, a manufacturer of backpacks and laptop bags doubled sales because its products have a tiny laundry label that says, “Nous sommes desoles que notre president soit un idiot. Nous n’avons pas vote pour lui.” Translated from the French, the label says, “We are sorry that our president is an idiot. We did not vote for him.”
Crime
• After a rebellion in Mexico failed in 1910, its leaders fled to the United States, where they were imprisoned under false charges. Union organizer Mother Jones spoke to President William Howard Taft and asked that the rebel leaders be pardoned. President Taft said, “Now, Mother, the trouble lies here: if I put the pardoning power in your hands, there would be no one left in the jails.” Mother Jones replied, “I’m not so sure of that, Mr. President. … A lot of those who are in would be out, but a lot of those who are out would be in.” President Taft laughed, and later he did as Mother Jones had asked and pardoned the rebel leaders. For such actions as this, Mother Jones became a hero to many people in Mexico as well as in the United States. (Of course, such actions meant that some people in both countries regarded her as a very dangerous woman.)
• In 1938, Margaret Bourke-White investigated problems in Jersey City, which was run by its corrupt mayor, “Boss” Frank Hague. He insisted that she be accompanied at all times by members of the local police, who were as corrupt as he was and who served as his private army. However, Ms. Bourke-White managed to elude the police escort one day, and she succeeded in taking photographs of a young girl staying home from school to help her family make money by making paper flowers. Ms. Bourke-White gave the most important film to one of her assistants, who smuggled it out of the city. This was fortunate because the police caught up with her and ripped some other film from her camera. The film that was smuggled out of Jersey City proved the existence of child labor there.
• Senator Jesse Helms once threatened President Bill Clinton, saying that if the President ever came to North Carolina, he had better have a bodyguard with him. Michael Moore, director of Roger and Me, was interested enough in the threat to have his researcher telephone the Secret Service in Washington, D.C., and make a complaint. During the call, the researcher discovered that the Secret Service was taking the threat seriously. After Senator Helms made his threat, the Secret Service interviewed him. Senator Helms’ name appeared on a list that the Secret Service keeps of people who have threatened the President.
• When Julius Caesar was a young man, pirates captured him and held him for ransom as he sailed for the Greek island of Rhodes. The sailors told him that they would ransom him for twenty talents—a very large sum of money. Caesar laughed at them, said that he was more valuable than that, and told them to ransom him for fifty talents. He also freely insulted the pirates and said that he would crucify them, but the pirates laughed at this threat. After Caesar had been ransomed, he organized a fleet of ships to hunt down the pirates. As he had promised, he crucified them.
• Thaddeus Stevens once told President Abraham Lincoln not to make any deals with Simon Cameron. When President Lincoln asked Mr. Stevens whether he thought that Mr. Cameron was a thief, Mr. Stevens replied, “I don’t think that he would steal a red-hot stove.” Word of Mr. Stevens’ comment got to Mr. Cameron, and he demanded that Mr. Stevens make a retraction. Therefore, Mr. Stevens told President Lincoln, “He is very mad and made me promise to retract. I will now do so. I believe I told you he would not steal a red-hot stove. I now take that back.”
• Some convicts are wise guys. In 1986, police in Green Bay, Wisconsin, placed an order for license plates for their unmarked police cars. Wisconsin convicts made the license plates, and on each license plate they put the initials “PD”—short for “Police Department.” Deputy Police Chief Robert Langan rejected the license plates and sent them back, saying, “They were a dead giveaway.”
• At a time of an epidemic of sexual assaults against women in Israel, the Israeli cabinet discussed instituting a curfew for women, thus not allowing women to be outside after a certain time. Israeli politician Golda Meir objected, “But it’s the men who are attacking the women. If there’s a curfew, let the men stay at home, not the women.”
• During Prohibition, many law enforcement officers were corrupt. One speakeasy in New York City was made with two entrances. After making a raid for the benefit of public relations, the federal agents would lock one door but not the other, with the result that as soon as the federal agents had left, the speakeasy was once again open for business.
• As a Chicago journalist, Eugene Field wrote the truth when he stated in an article, “Half the aldermen in the city are crooks.” The aldermen were not pleased with the article, and they demanded a retraction, so Mr. Field wrote, “Half the aldermen in the city are not crooks.”
Dance
• Things that are very good can be used for things that are very evil. For example, during the Middle Passage across the Atlantic Ocean the crews of slave ships would bring slaves up on deck to dance. This practice was known as “dancing the slaves.” The captains of the slave ships believed that the dancing would keep the slaves looking healthy so that they could be sold for a high price. Sometimes, the slaves were forced to sing as they danced. As you would expect, the songs were mournful laments about being forced into exile.
• Politicians often do not understand art. Martha Graham choreographed Phaedra, and Isamu Noguchi created a bed to be used as a prop on stage. The bed bothered Congressman Peter Freylinghuysen of New Jersey, but Ms. Graham informed him that the bed was uncomfortable, only one person could lie on it at a time, and it was totally unsuited for any kind of amorous activity, although the congressman was welcome to give it a try. Ms. Graham then added, “I think eroticism is a lovely thing. Don’t you?”
Death
• While in prison awaiting her execution, Marie Antoinette, Queen of France, was given no privacy. Her jailors even watched her dress and undress. Even while she was dressing on the morning of her execution, the jailors watched her—until she cried out, “In the name of God and decency, I beg you give me some privacy!” She did not object when the executioner cut off her long hair, but she became upset when she had to ride to the place of execution in a cattle cart rather than a coach. A crowd watched her ride in the cattle cart, and a mother held up her little daughter to see the doomed Queen of France. Not knowing what was going on, the little girl blew her a kiss, and Ms. Antoinette smiled briefly. Standing before the guillotine, Ms. Antoinette accidentally stepped on her executioner’s hand, and said, “Pardon me, monsieur. I did not do it on purpose.” Those were her last words.